Now I use products that are made for very sensitive skin, I don’t use any actives or exfoliants, and I wear sunscreen everyday. It’s a far cry from my 10 step routine from a year ago. It is working though. My skin is slowly healing and feeling much better.

Products:

DHC Deep Cleansing Oil

Vanicream Cleansing Bar

Vanicream Moisturizing Cream

The Ordinary 100% Cold-Pressed Marula Oil

Versed Guards Up Sunscreen

Baby Bum Mineral 50 Sunscreen

Four years ago, Michael and I started our own business and growth was slow because it was a side job for both of us. But we had finally found our niche in 2019 and business was booming. Of course, 2020 happened and we, like a lot of people, had to pause and reevaluate what we were doing. This move away from being an employee to being a full-time business owner was delayed by a good six or seven months. But here we are!

The first major thing I wanted to do was go through my wardrobe and get rid of everything that didn’t make me feel great to wear. The things I kept because I needed something to wear to work. The things I kept because they were as close to armor as I could get in a business casual setting.

It’s been wonderful. I can get into my small closet, Michael has space for his items, laundry day is so much quicker, and it’s all stuff that I love wearing and that I feel great in. My goal is to move into a handmade wardrobe as items wear out or I identify gaps in my wardrobe. Eventually, I’d like for everything I wear to be made by myself.

Outside of replacing a few staple products- my hair creme, conditioner, and toothpaste- that I ran out of I haven’t really bought anything else. I’m keeping a wishlist in my planner which lets me jot things down as they come to me and gives me the space to evaluate if I really want that things anyway. And so far, I generally don’t want it after a day or two.

One area where I have struggled, significantly, is eating out. I managed to get my shit together enough to bring lunch for two days (I was off for the first week of January) this past week. I did some creative mind games to justify why Chinese food wasn’t actually fast food (and I mean…it was veggie fried rice) one day but the rest of the time I ended up buying soups or salads from the grocery store next door during my lunch break. Overall, it was cheaper and healthier than going out for lunch but it’s not optimal. I have beefed up my stash of work snacks to include more healthy and filling options. I’m keeping almond milk, tea, cereal, nuts, and oatmeal in my desk now which helps when I get super hungry throughout the day.

Food is going to be the biggest struggle during my no buy. I can already tell. Michael and I like going out and exploring new places and sometimes, when we are both exhausted from a long day, it is so hard to muster up the energy to cook. Or worse, go to the store because all we have on hand is 5 types of beans and rice and we’ve already had rice and beans 3 days this week. And then cook. One day, at the end of the work week, I was well and truly about to lose my marbles and we got a taco box from Taco Bell for dinner. It’s been tough. Far tougher than not buying a new shirt or stopping myself from popping into Marshall’s on my way home from work.

Interestingly, the only time in the last 2 weeks that I’ve felt that familiar “oh that thing that person has is so nice and I’d really like one, I wonder how much they are, it’d be really nice and would make me feel lovely” feeling that generally leads me to go shopping was at brunch with my mom and sister today. I tend to do a lot of my shopping with them- general errands and fun shopping with my sister and thrift store shopping with my mom- and I think there was a part of my brain that recognized that dynamic and tried to sink into it. But once I stopped to think about it, “do I really need another pair of slippers?” and realized, that no, I don’t because I already have 3 pairs and rarely wear them, it was fine.

So, my plan going forward is to tackle the food/cooking situation. I think I have to tackle a few other problem areas before I’ll see a big improvement. Like, for example, my digital consumption. I’m spending too much on Reddit and YouTube and it’s eating up all of my available time away from work which includes time to cook and prep my meals. So, to address that, I’m adding a digital detox to my list of things I am doing to get the most out of my life. That began today and let me tell you, today is going by so slowly.

Well, well, well. Hello 2020.

This year, I have some big goals but the largest one looming in my mind is my No Buy Year. I have a problem- I shop and spend far too much and my husband and I are trying to accomplish some things in our lives where my spending habits are directly undermining our efforts.

I guess I should start at the beginning. I, for a very long time, engaged in a lot of retail therapy and I had some very unhealthy attitudes towards my spending. If I had the money (or almost had the money) then I could “afford” whatever stupid thing I was eyeballing. If I was bored, I shopped. Had a fight with a boyfriend, I shopped. Felt a little lonely after moving to a different state, I shopped. I spent all the money I had. I had no savings and no plan. I’ve done this all my life even as a small kid when I routinely conned my sister out of her allowance money so that I could buy even more Barbie accessories. And really, none of this changed until I got married and suddenly, my finances weren’t just my problem, they were Michael’s problem too.

But, I had a lot of…emotional baggage…surrounding money. Talking, or even thinking, about money sent me into a full blown panic attack. I don’t why the thought or the concept of personal finance scared me so much but it did. And I had so much guilt and shame and embarrassment wrapped around how I spent my money that I couldn’t even talk to Michael about it. And this went on for years, I dragged my feet on joining our finances together once we got married (we’re still working on it) and I generally buried my head in the sand about anything related to our finances.

But you know, at some point, I looked at myself and saw the 30 year old mess that I was. And it wasn’t fair to Michael, my family, or myself. I had healthy habits in every aspect of my life except for financially and it was beginning to really come back and bite me.

So last year, I began to take some steps to finally get a grip on my money and my feelings surrounding money. You know, stop letting the Man and advertising control what I do with my life. That sort of thing. I’ve gotten a lot better over the past year- we actually made a budget, I did Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University through my job, and we paid off one credit card and we only have one more to go. I can, mostly, talk about money and be ok. I’m learning about business accounting so that I can take that job on for the small business that we run. There has been a lot of progress and I’m ready to take it to the next level. I’m ready to do a No Buy.

And because I’m insane, it’s not a no buy month or few months, it’s a full year. Start the decade off with saving my money, paying off our debts, figuring out what a need is vs a want, and learning to be ok with wanting something and not having it. I’m excited to be resourceful and creative with the things that I already have. And really, I have everything I need already. I have more than I need. I have more than I even want and I feel like I’m drowning in Stuff. Do I need a fancy wooden bowl to hold walnuts on my dining room table? No. Of course I don’t. Do I need more fabric when I have the materials to complete 4 different projects already? No.

Now, because no rule exists without exceptions, I do have some things that are ok to spend on. I’ve read and watched a lot of other people’s guides on no/low buys and these rules are going to look different for everyone. Like I am prioritizing experiences over material objects. Personal growth and development are really important to me. I don’t want to not have a life for a year- what’s the point in that?

My No Buy Exceptions:

• replacements of products used
• experiences (museums, the movies, travel, etc.)
• work related expenses (we own a small business and things will have to be bought or made for that, there’s no way around it)
• birthday presents/gifts (for other people)
• fitness related items (not clothing/shoes) (my yoga studio fee, bicycle repairs, etc)
• education (classes, courses, seminars, etc)
• 2 haircuts/trims for the year

What is not OK (ie: I have way too much already/it’s super unhealthy):

• fast food
• eating out (other than special occasions)
• clothing, accessories, shoes
• new things “just to try”
• stationary
• home goods

A secondary goal, related to my exceptions, is that when I do need (and need is the key word) to buy something that I take the time to DIY it or try to find it on sale. Basically, make an effort to make it as affordable as possible. This extends to events as well, I’m going to start taking advantage of the reduced/free tickets to things I can get through my job and start looking into what free/cheap things my city offers. I’ve lived here for a long time and have barely explored it.

I’m excited. I’m ready. I already want a new pair shoes.